Edward’s Journal #3
March 5, 2011
This is our first away
series of the season and I can honestly say…it kind of sucks. I don’t really remember caring one way or the
other before…if we were out of town or not.
A game’s a game. Obviously rivals
are more fun to play, but this is just another team within our conference. We beat them by two last night and lost by
one today. Too many errors and our
relief pitcher…wasn’t much of a relief.
He worked Emmett’s ass off in the last inning with all those wild
throws. Hopefully tomorrow goes better.
Losing the game isn’t
the worst part. It’s being away from
Bella. Is that weird? I’ve
gotten so used to being with her every chance I get. Our alone time and our long conversations, texting
between classes and flirting with next to no words…and now…our physical
relationship. Yeah…I really miss that.
She’s gorgeous and
giving and so funny. I think I miss her
friendship as much as all the other stuff.
March 9, 2011
The good thing about
being away? Coming home. What a fucking welcome! My girl was waiting at my door with dinner (pizza
from our favorite place) and more kisses than I could count. Later she gave my tired muscles a massage and
then really worked me up before helping me relax again. But my mom raised a gentleman, so I was sure
to reciprocate. Afterwards, we were so
tired that we may have broken the “no week day sleep over rule” and she may
have been a tad late to class the next morning…hence the rule.
I’d be lying like a
dog if I said I was sorry.
March 15, 2011
Fewer words are
winding up on these pages it seems. I
save them for Bella. I want her to know
everything. I want to know everything
about her in return. She has an essay
due in her English class on Thursday, so she had to miss practice this
afternoon. It wasn’t the same without
her. I like her watching me where I’m
most confident. I know who I am when I’m
out on that field. I’m learning more
about who I want to be when I’m with her.
She makes it
impossible to hold anything back when I’m holding her in my arms. I don’t remember feeling this way about
anyone before. It’s like I need her.
March 18, 2011
I’m nervous as
shit. I don’t just want or need Bella…I
love her. And I’m going to tell her…tonight. I’ve slipped so many times and almost said it
over the last couple of weeks. Surely
she has to know. She’s been working so
hard on her essay this week and I miss her.
I miss her face. I miss her laugh
and her smell. I miss her squirms and
moans.
Shit. Study hall is doing me absolutely no good
today. I need to figure out where in the
hell she is. I haven’t kissed her nearly
enough this week and we’re about to be apart for a week.
Spring break sucks.
March 22, 2011
She loves me,
too. I thought she did. I’d hoped she did. But to hear it is…well, it’s what I’ve been
waiting for. It seems like I’ve waited
forever, but it’s just that I’ve been waiting for her. No one else.
I wanted her that
night…wanted to show her with my body, not just my words, just how much I meant
it. But the last time we escalated our
physical relationship and then I was out of town, the longing nearly drove me
crazy. After a long talk, we decided to
wait until we get back to school to have sex…make love? Both?
Either way. I just want to be
with her. It’s been so long for me I’m a
little nervous that I won’t make it good for her. I know it will be her first time, which is
scary enough, and I want it to be perfect.
She has all the
confidence in the world in me. I wish I
could borrow some of it from her.
Mom and Lucy are using
me as their little errand boy, running here, running there…all to get ready for
the engagement party. It’s not their
first and they still have wedding showers after this. Who knew there was so much grunt work that
goes into getting married?
I talk to Bella every
day, several times a day and we finally got a chance to Skype. She’s a devil woman, though. Perfect tits on display. Killing me.
Like I’m not jerking off enough as it is thanks to her dirty good
morning texts. I really hope she keeps
up with those when we get back to school.
I love it when she
teases me, but I can’t tell her that…well, not just yet anyway. She makes it so easy. She makes everything easy these days it seems.
March 24, 2011
Emmett texted me
during the party last night. He wanted
to surprise Bella. Something about he
owed her for something she did with Rosalie.
I don’t know. I didn’t bother
with the details. It was a way for me to
see my girl. What I do know is that it
took me about five seconds to talk to Mom and Dad once we got home, pack my
shit and get it in the car.
I have no idea if
she’ll be happy or pissed. I just know I
want to see her and I hope she feels the same way. She’s definitely worth getting up early and
making the five hour drive.
March 27, 2011
She was happy! Again…that girl knows how to welcome someone
properly. I found out later that Emmett
asking me to surprise Bella had a two-fold purpose…and those two are
devious! I never want to get on their
bad sides.
Apparently Bella
helped Rosalie do some scheming to snap Emmett out of some kind of relationship
rut, effectively driving Emmett to Bella’s for help getting rid of the mom
squad. When he found out she was the
master mind…he owed her…in more ways than one.
Like Bella said…my appearance was retaliation and restitution all
wrapped up in one.
Speaking of the
moms…somehow I missed out of the fact that Renée and Renata are twins. That was a trip. And Charlie…well…he was quiet at first. Confused as to why I was there in the first
place. But at least he knew about
me. And once we started talking sports,
everything was easy. And because I
wanted it to stay that way, I was fine with following the house rules, unlike
Rose and Emmett.
But that didn’t mean I
didn’t enjoy the tag-team tactic Bella and Emmett had worked out against their
mother-hovers so that we could each sneak off and…do what teenagers sometimes
do.
Now that we’re back at
school…I’m looking forward to being back in our little bubble where parents
don’t hover and there aren’t engagement parties to attend. It’s just me and her and us trying to find
our way in this world…together. Always
together.
I’m
ready for anything and everything…as long as it’s with her. Soon…so soon, the time will be right and I’ll
show her in every way.
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